If you are looking for a way to help your child sit patiently and participate actively during mealtimes, try this behavior strategy!
Child Behavior Strategies for Mealtime Participation
Sitting at Supper is a behavior strategy a parent can implement easily with a minimal level of pre-planning. Creating a ‘Choice Menu’ with your child is the first step, and providing a visual conversation game is the second step.
Example:
My child is 5 years old and cannot sit through dinner with the family. They will jump up, come back, take a few bites, if any bites at all, bang on the table, and sometimes just leave and play with their toys. We never have a peaceful family meal. Any suggestions?
Using Engagement Strategies
Engagement strategies to use before and during your dinner may help motivate your child to remain with the family and actually participate in the meal and conversation. These strategies include child choices and visual supports.
Quick Facts
- Child’s Age: 3-10
- Planning Effort: Moderate
- Difficulty Level: Easy
Pre-requisites
- The ability to connect pictures or words with meaning
- The ability to make choices, some food preferences
- The ability to take turns when motivated
Process
- Decide on possible dinner / supper choices of foods that include items you know your child likes within each pair of choices. For example, corn or peas; apple sauce or jello; hot dogs or eggs.
- Create a “Choice Menu” that includes words and pictures of the items with a place to mark a ‘check’ next to each item.
- Tell your child you need them to plan the evening’s meal. Allow them to choose the items, gather each item, and organize them in the kitchen. If possible, have them assist in the cooking.
- Locate 3 containers to place on your table, such as cups or cans that can hold Popsicle sticks or even strips of paper. One container says “First Turn to Talk”, the 2nd container says “Second Turn to Talk”, and the Third will say “All Done”.
- Your child can help to decorate each container with stickers, glued items, or crayons.
- Place one name of each person in your family on each stick or paper strip.
- Now you are ready for dinner. Place the containers on the table in a row. Have your child show the Menu to the family, announcing that they planned it.
- After everyone is served, tell the family you are playing a game and [child’s name] will be in charge of helping with the game. The game begins after everyone takes two bites of dinner.
- Have your child remove a stick from the first container. They should say the name (if unable to read, have a small photo or drawing). That person gets a turn to tell something to the family. Once the family member shares a fact, story, or something that happened that day, the child places it in the 2nd container.
- In between each turn, the rule is to take two bites and eat slowly before another turn.
- This continues until the 2nd container is filled, then begin again, placing the sticks into the 3rd container.
- Once the 3rd container is filled, the child can continue eating or ‘be finished’.
- If your child has a special interest or character, place an image on the menu and/or on the containers.
Documents and Related Resources
Visuals Sitting at Supper (PDF)
Seat Sheet and Collector Cards – a related strategy that might help with sitting at the table
This resource was authored by Watson Institute Special Education Consultant, Lisa Plastino, M.Ed.
If you have questions or concerns about the Watson Institute’s use of this information, please contact us.